It’s About Time

I haven’t got around to writing my September blog yet.

Which, given what I’m thinking about, feels rather appropriate.

Time.

There never seems to be enough of it.

We fill our days with work, family, commitments, things that need doing and things that feel as though they can’t wait. Before we know it, another week has gone by.

Sometimes I think we become so focused on fitting everything in that we forget to leave any space at all.

I’ve been reading Oliver Burkeman’s Four Thousand Weeks, which takes its title from the approximate number of weeks we might have if we live to 80. It’s a sobering thought.

His book challenges our obsession with productivity and the idea that, if we can just organise ourselves a little better, we might somehow manage to fit everything in.

But we can’t.

There will always be more things we could do, more places we could go, more books we could read, more things we could achieve.

And perhaps that’s the point.

I like having a bit of breathing space in my week. Time when I don’t have to be anywhere, do anything or achieve something. Time to slow down, potter about, think, or simply do very little.

And I think there’s something important about that.

We often talk about work-life balance and wellbeing as though they’re things we need to achieve, another item to add to the list. But perhaps wellbeing can sometimes be found in doing less, rather than trying to fit even more into our already busy lives.

Perhaps we don’t always need to find more time.

Perhaps we need to stop filling every bit of the time we already have.

This is something I notice in my counselling work too. We can be so keen to get somewhere—to understand, decide, change or feel better—that we forget that some things need time to unfold.

There isn’t always an answer waiting for us if we just try hard enough.

Sometimes we need to slow down enough to notice what’s going on.

To let things emerge.

To give ourselves a bit of space.

Making space for ourselves isn't always easy. We can be so used to being busy, useful and available to everyone else that slowing down can feel strangely uncomfortable. Yet having time to pause and reflect can be important, particularly during times of change or uncertainty.

Maybe that’s what I’m trying to remind myself of this September.

It’s okay not to get everything done.

It’s okay to slow down.

And sometimes, having a little more space in our lives is time well spent.

If you’re finding life particularly busy or are struggling to find space for yourself, counselling can offer an opportunity to slow down, reflect and make sense of what’s happening.

I offer counselling in Harrogate and online across the UK.