What is joy?

Is it the same as happiness? Or are they completely different things? And does it even matter?

Last week, while I was out and about, I saw a mother and her young daughter skipping down the road together. Properly skipping -  carefree, unselfconscious, completely in the moment.

I caught up with them and said, “That looks fun.”

They smiled, agreed… and carried on skipping.

And honestly, it stayed with me.

There was something about it that felt so simple and yet so profound. It made me wonder whether joy is connected to that childlike state we so often lose as adults - that freedom to just be, without worrying how we look or whether what we’re doing is productive or sensible.

I know I find joy in being with my friends. I play sport, and there’s something about stepping onto a court that instantly changes my state. Maybe I regress a little (or even a lot). Maybe that’s the point. There’s something playful about it. Something deeply alive.

And it’s not just the sport itself - it’s the people. Being around like-minded people whose company fills you up rather than drains you. That kind of joy feels sustaining somehow. It gives me something to look forward to. Something grounding.

And laughter…laughter is probably one of the biggest sources of joy in my life. I honestly don’t think I could do without it. I love those rare, belly-ache, can’t breath moments. 

I also find joy in my garden. It’s not big, but I love watching things grow and come to fruition, knowing I’ve created that little space. I get joy from watching birds jostling for position on the feeder and seeing the tiny dramas of nature play out in front of me.

And strangely, I get joy from random conversations with strangers too. Those brief moments of human connection that remind you we’re all just sharing this life together.

Maybe joy isn’t one big thing.

Maybe it lives in the small moments where we feel most present, most connected, most ourselves.

Or maybe joy is simply allowing ourselves, every now and then, to skip.

Perhaps the question isn't "What is joy?" but "What brings me joy?"

A beautiful peony from my garden in May